Sheboygan Depress (https://sheboygandepress.com/page/3/)
One might wonder if this new approach could lead to a hostile work environment or even hinder the police department’s efficacy. However, under Eastriver’s watchful eye, the department has excelled at keeping its rose-colored glasses firmly in place.
“Before Roe v. Wade was overturned I spent every day of my adult life holding up pictures of aborted fetuses, but for the last few months I have felt like my life no longer had purpose,” said Richard Harms. “So, when I had the chance to support Dan Kelly, a group of cells that also lacks the qualities necessary to be considered a human, I jumped at the chance.”
Walter White, teacher, “meth lab explosion”. Kelly Perez, judge, or maybe a nun, “I thought my ex was blowing up my house.” Nick Johansson, porch pirate, “I thought the earth was opening up to swallow me into the depths of hell.” Dr. Lisa Lily, cheese factory worker, “aliens.”
“It was surprisingly easy to find these books online,” said the power drunk principal. “Both ‘Fun Home’ and ‘Are You My Mother?’ are legally available to be checked out with a quick search on archive.org and we found ‘Gender Queer: A Memoir’ by simply typing the book’s title along with ‘ getcomics.info’ into google. That’s just unacceptable, so I had to pull the plug on the internet to keep our kids safe.”
“As the possibility of snow approaches, people are already starting to stockpile their go-to snow storm related complaints and conversation starters,” explained linguistics expert Dr. John Brown. He warns that it could become difficult to travel anywhere without running into some snow related discussion and recommends staying in if at all possible.
I used to think voting was just a way to get a free sticker to impress my Instagram followers,” admitted part-time influencer Jake Smith. “But then I realized that the people I vote for could actually end up in charge of stuff like schools, roads, and taxes. That’s like, a lot of pressure!
The Award from the Depress Institute honors the lack of journalistic integrity displayed in WHBL’s Nov. 8th coverage of City Administrator Todd Wolf being placed on on leave. “At first we were worried that someone else had started writing satire,” said the Depress Institute’s Chair and only member, Chaz Cole. “Spreading wild conspiracy theories of a diversity group being capable of quietly orchestrating Wolf’s failures to get him suspended would be hilarious as satire, but to do it with a straight face… kudos. Enjoy your, well earned, award.”
“Right now our people are worried that if they use abhorrent, harmful, words that the public will expect us to show we are committed to inclusivity and equality rather than just saying we are,” said City Administrator Rod Fox. “This new dress code is the best way for our people to know they’re in a safe space whenever we get the clan together.”
“I’m at a loss. Do I care more about having control over women’s bodily autonomy since none will let me near them?,” said Regular Schmo on his AM talk radio show on WHNE. “Or… do I care more about compensating for my little pee pee with a love for guns? All I know for sure is most conservative men must be facing the same conundrum.”
“If we allow women to have autonomy over their body, we will rob countless fetuses of the ability to grow up to live in fear of, or even experience, being killed in a mass shooting event and that is in direct conflict with what our forefathers laid out when they created this great nation,” wrote Justice Thomas in his opinion handed down Wednesday morning.
“Before Roe v. Wade was overturned I spent every day of my adult life holding up pictures of aborted fetuses, but for the last few months I have felt like my life no longer had purpose,” said Richard Harms. “So, when I had the chance to support Dan Kelly, a group of cells that also lacks the qualities necessary to be considered a human, I jumped at the chance.”
Walter White, teacher, “meth lab explosion”. Kelly Perez, judge, or maybe a nun, “I thought my ex was blowing up my house.” Nick Johansson, porch pirate, “I thought the earth was opening up to swallow me into the depths of hell.” Dr. Lisa Lily, cheese factory worker, “aliens.”
“It was surprisingly easy to find these books online,” said the power drunk principal. “Both ‘Fun Home’ and ‘Are You My Mother?’ are legally available to be checked out with a quick search on archive.org and we found ‘Gender Queer: A Memoir’ by simply typing the book’s title along with ‘ getcomics.info’ into google. That’s just unacceptable, so I had to pull the plug on the internet to keep our kids safe.”
“As the possibility of snow approaches, people are already starting to stockpile their go-to snow storm related complaints and conversation starters,” explained linguistics expert Dr. John Brown. He warns that it could become difficult to travel anywhere without running into some snow related discussion and recommends staying in if at all possible.
I used to think voting was just a way to get a free sticker to impress my Instagram followers,” admitted part-time influencer Jake Smith. “But then I realized that the people I vote for could actually end up in charge of stuff like schools, roads, and taxes. That’s like, a lot of pressure!
The Award from the Depress Institute honors the lack of journalistic integrity displayed in WHBL’s Nov. 8th coverage of City Administrator Todd Wolf being placed on on leave. “At first we were worried that someone else had started writing satire,” said the Depress Institute’s Chair and only member, Chaz Cole. “Spreading wild conspiracy theories of a diversity group being capable of quietly orchestrating Wolf’s failures to get him suspended would be hilarious as satire, but to do it with a straight face… kudos. Enjoy your, well earned, award.”
“Right now our people are worried that if they use abhorrent, harmful, words that the public will expect us to show we are committed to inclusivity and equality rather than just saying we are,” said City Administrator Rod Fox. “This new dress code is the best way for our people to know they’re in a safe space whenever we get the clan together.”
“I’m at a loss. Do I care more about having control over women’s bodily autonomy since none will let me near them?,” said Regular Schmo on his AM talk radio show on WHNE. “Or… do I care more about compensating for my little pee pee with a love for guns? All I know for sure is most conservative men must be facing the same conundrum.”
“If we allow women to have autonomy over their body, we will rob countless fetuses of the ability to grow up to live in fear of, or even experience, being killed in a mass shooting event and that is in direct conflict with what our forefathers laid out when they created this great nation,” wrote Justice Thomas in his opinion handed down Wednesday morning.
We’ve already determined that schools are holding facilities for kids while their parents work to scrape by serving the economy so Jeff Bezos can continue to afford to build dick rockets. We literally can’t afford to close for the day and statistically speaking less than 1% of kids will die in auto accidents if we open. Big whoop. If you’re scared stay home, but we need to consider the dick rockets.